A DIFFICULT AFTERNOON

Hot and humid again today. Two entire weeks without turning off the A/C. This heat wave has been going on since the day my brother died. Really strange.

Woke up this morning and actually had not pain in my back. I usually have to walk around and sit and stand and work the pain out of my hip. I think the chiropractor is helping.

I got up early this morning to get to the hair salon for an 8:30 am appointment. My husband decided to come with me so that I didn't have to go back home to pick him up so we could go to my brother's apartment and do more cleaning out.

I got there and guess what? My appointment was for 9:30. We were going to hang out but we decided to run the car wash. Got back at 9:00 and he started my color and I was out of there by 10:00 am. Stopped by my daughter's before going to my brother's apartment. Had a nice surprise for her, a frappacinno from *buck's. Spent about an hour or so at my brother's. That's about all I can handle at this time. But I am well aware that I need to get this stuff done by the 31st of July. That is what his rent is paid until.

We grabbed some lunch at my brother's favorite greasy spoon and old time dinner/ice cream place. Really old. Still has Formica counters and tables and chairs that don't match and silverware that doesn't match and dishes that don't match. The food is excellent. I had a cheese omelet with homemade white breaded toasted and my husband had a western egg sandwich with cheese on a homemade hard roll. Then my husband ordered the homemade strawberry shortcake. Real baking powdered biscuits, warmed with fresh sliced strawberries and homemade whipped cream. You can actually watch the waitress put the whole thing together, we always sit at the counter, that's where the action is. The whipped cream is served right from the stainless steel bowl it was shipped in. It sets in a bowl of ice water to keep it cool. The strawberries are in a bigger stainless steel bowl floating around in the simple syrup that was made just for them. And the stacks of fresh made biscuits are teetering on a huge plate right there behind the counter.

I had a very difficult afternoon. Saturdays were usually the day when my brother would drop in for a quick visit. He would come up on the porch and sit himself down on his favorite rocking chair and we would have long chats. I sat looking at that chair today hoping he was sitting there again. I also received a lovely sympathy card from one of his best friends of 24 years. A female friend. Someone that I think he would have married if she had not gotten married before he could pop the question. They were still very good friends and they still shared dinners, lunches and drinks after work. She was at the wake and funeral but her card was just to let me know she was thinking of him and me and that there was a hole in heart. I know the feeling I have the same hole and it is not ever going to fill back up. She sent me her e mail address so I dropped her a note to tell her I would never forget her and that I will keep in touch.

I think my difficult afternoon had a lot to do with the fact that I didn't have anything to do. I have to keep busy in order to keep my mind off of things. Oh, believe me there are plenty of things to do around the house, but that sort of thing is not enough. I need to be with people and today it was only my husband and myself rattling around in the house and it was even too hot to sit on the porch.

Hopefully my neighbor and I can get together later for a game of Scrabble.